


Deborah

by Aryshp



Category: Men's Football RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Nazi Germany, Alternate Universe - World War II, Cheating, Europe, F/M, Fake Marriage, Forbidden Love, Historical, Holocaust, Post-World War II, True Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-19
Updated: 2020-09-19
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:13:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,802
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26551177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aryshp/pseuds/Aryshp
Summary: Nothing happens without any specific reason, but at the end, I'm the winner of your heart in this forbidden romance|a 24
Comments: 2
Kudos: 1





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello to everyone, this story is my first work that I publish in archive of our own.  
> This is a historical fiction that happens in Nazi era (1933-1945) in Germany and Belgium. This is mostly a novel than a fan fiction.  
> Important note 1: I'm respectful to members of all religions and beliefs (as i mentioned Jewish people in this novel).  
> Important note 2: any resemblances to real people (despite Marc-Andre ter Stegen) is completely coincidental.
> 
> please leave your comments on this chapter🙏

Chapter 1:

I did the last stitch then gave that handmade doll to Little Natalia. Then I said to her:

\- Take care dear niece, I love you. 

Then I burst into tears. I couldn't stop crying. Natalia said:

\- Auntie Deborah, why are you crying? 

\- because I will miss you, sweetheart. Take care of yourself and also your doll.

\- I wanna name her Auntie Deborah. 

\- Your Müttergan will buy many beautiful dolls in the United States for you. But watch out this doll, this is a gift from your Auntie and your Oma. 

\- Sure. 

I kissed her little cheeks. Natalia was so young to understand this amount of painful facts. She was born as a Jewish in Nazi Germany and she couldn't understand it. She couldn't understand anything but happiness and Joy. Her world was so beautiful because there was no place for conflicts or racism. Nina came toward me and said to me:

\- Take care, Deborah. 

Then she put a wad inside of my dress pocket. I asked:

\- what's this? 

\- soon we will see each other in New York. This would be my address. 

\- New York City? It's impossible for me. 

\- No, even if Mütter wouldn't come to the US, do it alone or with the help of your sweetheart. 

\- David? Oh no.

She whispered in my ears:

\- visit him tonight, then plan for an elopement! 

\- No, NO. 

\- don't act that naive, girl. You're already 22. 

\- I won't elope. I won't leave Mütter. 

\- Okay, stay in Germany and wait for Hitler to come and kill you.

\- don't be a dramatic, Nina. 

\- I don't know. But talk to him tonight and escape from this hell as soon as possible. 

\- Bye Bye Nina. Take care. 

\- don't forget to speak to him. 

\- Bye.

The driver said to Nina:

\- Mrs. Goldstein, it's already late. 

Nina held Natalia's little hands and they got in the car. They shook their hands and shouted:

\- Bye Oma Scarlett, Bye Auntie Deborah. 

They left us. Mütter burst into tears and said:

\- my beloved Nina is gone. My Grandchild is gone. They are gone to a neverland. 

\- Mütter, I think they made the right choice. 

Mütter was sobbing. She said:

\- No, damn me. Why I let Nina marry that Jew 6 years ago? 

\- Mütter, you married a Jewish man years ago too. 

She said:

\- Shut up. Damn Manuel, Juden Mann. Why I let my girl marry him? 

\- your girls are Jewish, Mütter.

\- this is our country, this is our home. Why they left us? Nothing happens over the borders. 

\- Mütter, we should come back to the apartment. It's not good to speak about politics here. 

\- okay, let's go. But the alley is empty. 

\- nowhere is safe enough Mütter.

We came upstairs and reached our cozy little apartment. 

As we arrived at home, Mama sat on the sofa and said:

\- home sweet home. I won't leave my country. 

\- would you like a cup of coffee? 

\- no, the doctor forced me not to drink coffee because of my blood pressure.

I came to the kitchen, poured coffee in the coffee pot, and said:

\- Mütter, this place is not safe at all. 

\- why? 

\- they want to kill us. 

\- who? 

\- Nazi Government. 

Mütter laughed out loud. I became surprised and asked:

\- Mütter, is death funny? 

\- not at all meine Liebe. But for what? They won't kill someone without any specific reason. We are neither communists nor political activists. 

\- Judaism. They hate my race and my religion. 

I felt my tears pouring down on my cheeks. Mütter came to the kitchen and cleaned my tears with her hands. She said:

\- don't worry my little girl. 

\- you are not Jewish. You are a typical Catholic woman from Dresden 

\- how could they understand your religion? You are not a man who wears a kippah! 

\- Mütter, they want my ancestors. My father was a jew. And my name in Hebrew. 

\- my mother was a devoted Christian woman and her name was Deborah. This name is Biblical. And also, you're a Mischlinge. So you won't be exiled from your country. You can't live your life. 

\- Living my life? HAHAHA. 

I sat down on our dining chair and said:

\- two months ago, they fired me. Seems that you forgot it. 

\- if they ever kill a jew, they would kill a rich one. Not you! 

\- they have a problem with our race, neither our money nor our beliefs. 

\- you are not a religious Jewish.

\- Mütter, Race not beliefs!!! 

\- stop crying please darling. I prefer death to see your tears streaming down on your beloved face. 

I ate a cookie that was left on the table since breakfast then I said:

\- mom, I want to emigrate to New York. 

Mom laughed hysterically. And said:

\- what's actually going on in New York City? Is there money on trees instead of fruits, or money is floating on its water canals??

I screamed and said:

\- there's no nazism, no Heil Hitler, no racial discrimination, no death, no death Mama!

Mütter said reluctantly:

\- if want to go, go to Switzerland. Go to your brother!

\- I won't go alone, I go with you and also David. 

\- no! I won't ever leave here. 

\- mom, you are already an immigrant! 

\- from where? 

\- Dresden. Years ago, you immigrated from Dresden to here, Aachen. Immigration is something simple. 

\- no, not all. And I didn't immigrate, I just moved inside my Mutterland!! That time I was 19, madly in love with your Papa so I left my hometown to move in with my husband. Who was from this city. I fucking missed my city at that time. 

\- then you had gotten used to it! It's not a big problem! 

\- At that time I was young, open-minded, and flexible. But now I'm in my early sixties. I won't ever leave her. 

\- mom, you are not old! 

\- I am. 

I was tired of arguing. I said:

\- my sister Nina talked to you for about six months but you were stone. This is the last call, here is not our place anymore. 

\- Here is! Your papa was a penniless shoemaker and he was a scholar Jew, actually an atheist. And I'm a Christian. We baptized you and Nina and Samuel. After Steffan's death, his relatives left me with three kids and a flat broke business which was his legacy. You were only two when he died and your caring Jewish relatives haven't ever visited you. 

She burst into tears and said:

\- i struggled to live! I struggled to bring you and your siblings up. When i became a widow, i was only 35 and your Dad was in debt. But i made that flat broke business to a successful show company. Not a popular one, but at least now we have enough to live our lives. That time, i even wanted to sold myself to prostitution.

\- really? 

\- yeah, because my children were hungry and I couldn't afford anything. 

\- then? 

\- nothing. I came to a brothel and slept with 3 men just to buy bread for your food and bus ticket to Dresden. i sent you and Nina to Dresden. I started to sell whatever i had, even my dresses. I sold our big house and rented a small nest. I started to work as a waitress for paying your dad's bills and your 10 years old brother was working as paperboy that time. After a hard year of cleaning tables from day night and sleeping with strangers from night to day, we didn't have any debt. We started again, without any help. 

\- Oh God. 

She crossed herself. 

\- Mütter, have you ever listened to die Früher? Germany's president, leader, chancellor, king,... 

\- yes. 

\- did he say anything about money? Did he say that he only kills Jewish businessmen? Or rich Jewish doctors? 

\- No. 

\- so what did he say? 

After remembering die Früher's speeches, I shivered. Mütter said:

\- he would arrest unpleasant races. You are not unpleasant, you are a Mischlinge with very German appearances. You have blonde hair and blue eyes. You are not slender, you are tall. Your face is identical to that ideal German woman in Nazi propaganda. 

\- okay Mütter, enough. 

I ran into my room and changed my dress, wore makeup, and made my hair as fastest as I could. Mütter rushed into my room and taunted me:

\- where are you going? Masquerade?

\- it's not a time for masquerade.

\- so where the hell are you going? 

\- David's place. 

\- Damn boy, I hate that son of the bitch. 

\- I love him. But he's not my sweetheart. 

\- if he's not your sweetheart, why you dressed up yourself like a tart?? 

I was so angry. I shouted to Mütter and told her:

\- you always wanted to downgrade me. I'm not going to fornicate with him. I'm still a virgin and I have many big troubles so I don't care about sex. 

\- David doesn't think like you.

\- he's more miserable than me. he's too religious to think about having sex out of the wedlock. 

\- Lust would come unexpectedly when a girl and boy are alone together. 

\- come on mütter, I'm done, okay. Tschüss. 

\- Auf Wiedersehen! Come back as soon as possible. Don't leave me like this. 

\- be sure, I don't have a valid passport. 

She said in a moment of anger:

\- I hate David. I don't care about your future anymore. Go wherever you want but you must marry him. 

\- mütter, it's not the time for a wedding. 

\- it is!! I solemnly swear that I won't let you live Aachen with that boy out of wedlock. 

\- okay, I will tell him! 

I ran out of our apartment but mutter chased me and said to me angrily:

\- I'm strict about my beliefs. You must get married.

\- mutter if I knit the knots with David, I would be recognized as a Jewish! 

\- I don't care. It's your choice.

\- Mütter, I love David but I'm not sure about the wedding. Wedding for me means surrendering everything to the Nazi government!

\- you can break up easily and marry a decent German boy. 

\- Mütter, Germans are worshipping die Früher. Who marries a Mischlinge girl? Who wants Jewish blood in his children's veins? 

\- I will find a man for you. 

\- Mom, the law won't let me marry a German man! 

Mütter looked at me disappointedly and told me:

\- Auf Wiedersehen.


	2. chapter 2

Aachen, Nazi Germany, winter 1937.

I knocked the door. David opened the door, hugged me and kissed me on cheeks. He told me happily:

\- I am freaking happy Deborah. Nothing is better than seeing you in my place, welcome to our love shack, Queenie!

\- thanks David.

I walked through his small living room and I sat on his secondhand sofa. He asked me:

  * Gin or cognac?
  * I’m not here to drink or eat.



David became shocked. He shook his head, asked me:

  * what happened Deborah? You look worried.



I burst into tears and said him:

  * My mom forced me to get married!
  * Why you’re crying? Why you are upset?



He ran into me and kissed my lips. Our very first kiss but it went terrible. He said to me:

  * don’t you wanna be my wife? I love you!
  * I love you too.



David stood up and asked me in wonder:

  * Do you mean that your Mom forced you to marry another guy????
  * No, No, No.
  * So, there’s no place for grief. Be happy!
  * Marriage is not as romantic as you think.
  * IT IS as romantic as I think, Schatz.



I stopped crying and I replied to him:

  * David, we just know each other for three months. It’s a bit early for knitting the knots.
  * I agree with you but we know each other well.



I stood up next to David, rested my head on his shoulders and restarted crying. He hugged me and whispered in my ears:

  * I’m here for you. I promise to love you forever, I will stay with you until my last breath, don’t be afraid, baby. I know you trust me too.
  * David I’m too young for marriage. I’m still 22 years old but you are 32.
  * You have everything that I could dream about it. Our age gap is ideal; wives must be younger than their men because of their fertility. Aw Deborah, you would be young mother of my children.



He kissed me again. And he touched my body and it made me worried.

\- David, NO. it’s too soon.

I sat on sofa again. David became annoyed. I told him:

  * I’m going to emigrate to united states but my mother doesn’t let me to emigrate with you out of the wedlock.
  * She’s right. Completely right.
  * She won’t come to US.
  * She’s Christian but we are Jewish. This country is hell for us, we must leave it.



He fixed his kippah on his head. I replied to him:

  * I’m a mischlinge. I’m not a religious person at all.
  * Why? God is your owner, let him to be in all aspects of your life, Deborah. Religion won’t make you limited, it makes you successful both in this world and afterlife.
  * Stop it please.



I covered my ears with my hands. I said to David:

  * I’m sick of these religious words. I will marry you. Don’t preach, meine Liebe.



He kissed me and said:

  * Okay girl. Coffee?
  * Why not?



I laughed. I took my coat off, and stayed next to his fireplace. it was off. I shouted at David:

  * It’s so cold David, I’m freezing. Start it please.
  * I can’t afford gas prices and I hate lumber.
  * How you tolerate with this cold weather? It’s colder than outside.
  * We are emigrating, Deborah. We can’t waste a single Deutsche mark.
  * We can’t emigrate with flu.
  * No one has died after catching cold or flu.



David brought us two cups of coffee. I asked him:

  * My mom just wants us to say our vows and standing down the aisle. There’s no need for an official wedding.
  * Gotcha, you don’t wanna be registered as a Jewish woman. Every girl wants an official wedding, white dress, flowers, …
  * I’m not a typical girl, David.



I placed cups on coffee table. Sat next to me and held my hands. I asked him:

  * David our marriage is not a typical one. Our situation is not normal and my dreams are not like other girls’.
  * I know what you mean.
  * Let’s get married in this place.



David stared in my eyes and said:

  * I love you. I don’t want to marry you in a terrible place like this studio.
  * We will celebrate our wedding in Florida, Let’s have our religious wedding here.
  * My studio is terrible. It’s not good for hosting lots of guests.



I replied hopelessly:

  * Just me and you and two witnesses.
  * You know that my parents have died years ago. My older sister raised me up, I can’t have my celebration without her.
  * Ok, invite her.
  * She’s not alone. She’s married to a businessman and they have two daughters.
  * Becca and Margot?
  * Becca is 12 and Margot is 17.
  * Invite them and their dad, too.
  * invite your siblings too.
  * My siblings are not here. Nina went to US and my brother is living in Geneva.



I was forced to marry my boyfriend; I loved him but I had never thought of marrying him. He was an orthodox Jewish and I was an atheist Mischlinge. I begged him:

  * David, I know your previous boss kicked you out but please find a way to earn money.
  * Deborah, I educated in university for what? Answer me. Why does someone study in university????



David was so angry. I asked him miserably:

  * Why you are mad at me?
  * I’m not mad at you. I studied at university to be an architect, not a construction worker.
  * I mean, we need money to live, I have some but we can’t live on our savings. We are not something special from other people. I’m teaching French to Jewish kids, it’s very different from my beloved previous job.
  * What do you mean? You want me to teach Architecture to Jewish kids??
  * I didn’t mean that.



I felt disappointed, I thought of ‘break up”. I asked him:

  * Do you know dr. Goldstein.
  * no?
  * He’s my sister’s brother in law. He’s a physician, specialist in Neurology.
  * And?
  * He’s a Jew. he can’t work anymore in his profession so he actually works as a merchant and a biology teacher,
  * We will emigrate soon.
  * When?
  * In four weeks.
  * So, no money to waste. No wedding party, no wedding dinner, no dance, no flowers, …
  * Will you wear a white dress?
  * I will wear my mother’s wedding dress.



Suddenly, I started crying. It wasn’t my desired wedding; David wasn’t my desired husband too but nothing could stop me. I just wanted US, a safe life in US. I told David:

  * Let’s get married on tomorrow.
  * Really?
  * We will have a great party after our first child’s birth in US. Ok?
  * Ok, meine liebe.



**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for being late, i would update the next chapter sooner. translation is time consuming.

**Author's Note:**

> (translation of German phrases
> 
> Mütter: mom/ Müttergan: Mommy/ Meine liebe: my love/ Juden Mann: Jewish man/Mischlinge: Hybrid, someone from two different races/ Tschüss=Auf Wiedersehen: bye)
> 
> Please leave your comments on this chapter🙏


End file.
